"Hello, we are Those People Who Blame the Coffee Shop for The Fact That They're Running Late."

I'm the businessman who has to drive half an hour to work, but stops by the coffee shop around 7am to "grab a quick cup of coffee" before rushing back out onto the freeways. However, I'm already running about five minutes behind when I jump into my Sebring, so I cannot afford to wait in line; paradoxically, however, I choose to stop by the coffee shop right in the midst of their morning rush hour. I stand impatiently in line, shifting my weight from one leg to the other, hands shoved in my pockets except when I pull out my left arm to check my watch once every twenty seconds. When I finally get to the counter I place my order and emphasize, "And I'm in hurry," as if this will magically erase the other fifteen lattes that the baristas need to make before getting to my order.

I stand to the side and wait patiently for about fourteen seconds, before I approach the bar and declare, "Is it ready yet? I really need to be going." Obviously, out of all the people waiting for their beverages, I am the one in the biggest hurry. However, I am disgusted that it takes a full three minutes for me to get my order, and I rush back out to work. When I get to the office twenty minutes late, I grumble, "Sorry everyone, the service at the coffee shop where I stopped this morning was terrible."

It's very nice to meet you.